I Spy A Dragonfly Which Tells Me I Have Veils in my Eyes

I have been seeing dragonflies for sometime. They are really very pretty with shiny wings - ethereal as if they come from another world. Only a few days ago did it hit me that it was a power animal passing along a message.

You see with power animals, they would keep appearing until you finally get the message. After many incidences with the turtle (telling me to slow down), the horse (telling me to be graceful with the flow), and just not too long ago the squirrel (to reserve energy, or whatever resources), the dragonfly came shortly after.

The dragonfly was popping in and out for sometime. The other day while I was driving, this dragonfly flew alongside my car all the way from the highway to midvalley. So I thought perhaps it was my little green dragon playing around again. It was still quite an extraordinary thing. This was when I knew it was a power animal message.

So I googled that up. There were many things about what dragonflies bring. Making magic, creating something new, etc. But what caught my eye was this: "Dissolving illusion". I thought..illusion? What illusion? I don't have illusions. I have only truths. Yet it was nagging at my heart.

Yes, oh how naively egoistical sometimes a personality can be. Last weekend I went for a healing session. It was terribly intense. I cried for two hours while talking about things, digging things out that I buried deep. Everything I thought was my truth became lies I had been telling myself for a very long time. I am still recovering, as it was really a whole truckload of stuff. All those old feelings, all at once...it wasn't pleasant.

Yes...all illusions. Shattered. Like glass. Some still poking the sides of my heart. Some went into my eye which tears at my tearglands from time to time. Some seemed to have settled deep within my core, that gives into depression and despair.

But what is difficult is knowing I have NO MORE EXCUSES. I cannot hide behind these veils anymore. No more poor-me-no-one-loves-me. No more God-owes-me. No more everyone-else-sucks-but-me. It's a slap right and left across the cheek and then a whack at the backside.

I don't know who I am anymore. I don't even know if I can ever love again, since what I once thought was love is nothing more than an addiction to fear. And another part is still in denial because the feelings can get really awful. I now question my every move and thought - is this real or am I being delusional again?

This weekend has to be the darkest one I have had in a very long time. The heart is tender, because it is now open. No more running away from demons. Yet oh so vulnerable. Truly a breakthru...the heart is truly broken thru.

No wonder I was so resistant to the healing session. And it was an invitation - I usually accept it with gratitude! This higher self/soul/angels know what to send my way, really. I am awed.

It's all been one neat nice little heart chakra healing after another. Last weekend, Kundalini Yoga, then Anne Jones Healing Evening, which proceeded to a beautiful heart chakra session for my Lightbody Course. And that's when all fossils cracked open...gradually but surely.

Am I oK now? I don't know. I feel OK, but those old emotions come back from time to time. I really don't know much anymore.

Yes, this was what the Dragonfly was saying.

And immediately after the Dragonfly, the Wolves came. I didn't see actual wolves, it was through my third eye - very sharp images. Three of them with yellow eyes. One stayed with me throughout the weekend. Perhaps that's where I got this additional inner strength to pull myself together and to lift myself out of that dark space. Also lightbody on the heart chakra helped a lot. Lightbody started it and wrapped it up. I feel OK now. And lighter than before.

Life feels different. Where am I? Not sure...Here there everywehre nowhere. Staying put where I geographically am, yet I am travelling everyday into different spaces. At this point, it's still sort of bittersweet.